Understanding & Changing Your Beliefs
This is perhaps one of the most important pages on the Self Creation site. If you act on the information on this page, I guarantee your life will never be the same. A bold statement, but true.
Beliefs are any ideas you think are true about yourself, others, and life. Clarity about what you believe, who you are, what you want, and why you want it can be like a beacon on a clear night, guiding you to the fulfillment of your desires.
Unfortunately, most of us aren't aware of our beliefs, many of which we acquired as children. You can live your whole life unaware of how you're beliefs are effecting your feelings, thoughts and actions.
Some beliefs are counter-productive to what you say you want. Wouldn't it be nice to identify those beliefs? Examine them for validity? There are so many self-defeating beliefs but here are just a few I've identified in myself and others. Do you believe any of the following?
Self Defeating Beliefs
- If I'm happy now, I won't be motivated to change anything.
- I can't change. This is just the way I am.
- My feelings are natural reactions, not something I can control.
- If I control my feelings, I'll be a robot.
- I have to have [love, sex, or money] in order to be happy.
- If I don't feel guilty, I’ll continue to do "bad" things.
- You have to do some things you don't want to do in this life.
- No pain, no gain.
- If I was happy all the time, I’d be a blithering idiot.
- People who are optimistic aren't realistic.
- You can’t have your cake and eat it too.
- If happiness was my priority, I'd be inconsiderate of others.
- It's a dog-eat-dog world out there.
Changing Your Beliefs
So far this site has mainly engaged you at the reading level. Changing the beliefs that are causing you pain is where the rubber really hits the road. If you are serious about wanting to turn your life around, you're going to have to go beyond simply reading. You will not experience change reading about ideas. Oh, I'm all for ideas. I love to read too. But real change doesn't happen until it's personal.
I don't know if you're like me, but I have read a lot of books, attended a lot of programs, listened to umpteen tapes and talked about personal growth a tremendous amount. But none of this really made any huge difference in how I felt, what I did, or helped me get what I wanted, at least not in the long term.
I'm telling you this because I've been where you are. If you're reading this, you're searching for answers. I didn't experience any concrete changes in my life until I was exposed to the Option questioning process.
Although the Options has been compared to many different types of psychotherapies, it is radically different than anything I've ever experienced. It's the only process I've found that not only helped me changed my mind, but where you could visibly see the differences in my life. And isn't that what we all want? I mean it's nice to feel inspired and get high off a new realization, but what I really wanted was to feel better about myself and life on a more consistent basis. I wanted to be able to pursue my desires without all the fears (and they were numerous.) I wanted to make more permanent changes where I didn't keep falling back into old habits that weren't working. The Option Method helped me do all that for myself.
There are two ways to change a belief, using either Option or the Lefkoe Method. Interestingly enough, their core ideas are remarkably similar. Once you change a belief, you'll never look back.
The Option Institute
Founder Barry Neil Kaufman offers the most amazing personal growth retreats and The Option Process® Dialogue. (This is the one where I have spent most of my time.) Schedule an Option Process® Dialogue for yourself. Also check out the Belief Makers Blog on a wide range of ideas all centered around beliefs.
Center for the Option Method
Bruce Di Marsico created the Option Method in 1970. His students and the subsequent students that followed continue his teachings putting their own unique personalities, discoveries, developments and variations to it. Offers the Option Method Dialogue.
The Morty Lefkoe Method Institute
Lefkoe's Free Online Tool for Changing Beliefs
(Definitely give this one a go!)
How We Create Beliefs in the First Place
As children we played “make believe”. It was fun but then it was time to face reality. Yet when you look at it closely, we are still in the game of making beliefs.
Why We Consider Our Beliefs To Be The Truth
We make up reasons for why things happen and assign a meaning to it. We forget we made it up, and start thinking of it as "the truth."
How Beliefs Are Reinforced
Here’s the most amazing realization about beliefs. Even if everyone believes it, and we see evidence of its truthfulness, and it happens again and again, it still doesn’t make it true!! Whoa, crazy huh?
The Impact Beliefs Have On Your Life
The reason beliefs impact our lives with such tenacious power is because they determine how you will feel and behave in a given set of circumstances.
How To Change Your Beliefs
Examines the Option questionins in detail and why it works.